Massive Motivity

As pre-planning progressed, there were two significant show-stoppers that maintained our focus: the RV and a truck to pull it.  Although the RV search could be concurrently preformed with the truck search, we would eventually need to purchase the truck first (to tow the latter). 

After scanning countless RV forums--as well as getting information from knowledgeable and trusted friends--we selected our first requirement: diesel.  The premise to purchase a diesel truck was taken with a degree of caution, as we had never owned or worked with diesel engine technology.  Moving in this direction would require us to become knowledgeable on a topic that we were completely naive. 

After deciding on diesel power, the choice of vehicle brand became easy...if not obvious.  I am not "brand loyal" when it comes to vehicles.  I buy primarily on (needed) capability and reliability.  In buying a capable and reliable diesel engine, one name continued to surface: Cummings.  This simplified things dramatically, as the only pick-up trucks with Cummings engines are Dodge Rams.

With the search narrowed to Dodge Rams, we focused on capability.  Even though the exact 5th wheel brand/specs had not been decided, we set an upper limit of how much we wanted to tow of 14,000 lbs.  We came about this figure by using the highest "Gross Vehicle Weight Rating" (the maximum weight the RV and all contents can safely be operated) of all the potential RV brands on our wish list.

"There are three types of people in the world: those who are good with numbers, and those who are not."  - Unknown Author

In an effort to be as safety conscience as possible, I followed the conservative towing recommendations outlined in a few on-line sites for RVers.  There were two primary figures that I need to attain: How much can I pull (tow) horizontally down the highway, and how much additional vertical weight can my truck axles support?  

The first question was simple, as the aforementioned 14,000 lbs was the most we wanted to tow; however, we didn't want to always be stressing the truck at 100% capacity, so we added a 10% safety buffer.  The second figure was the rear axle weight, and a conservative estimate of 20% of the trailer weight was used to derive a "pin weight", or amount of weight the RV would be placing on the rear axle. 

So now we needed a truck that could tow 15,550 lbs [15,550 lbs - 1,555 lbs (10% of max towing) = 13,995 lbs (close enough)], as well as handle an additional 2,800 lbs over the rear axle.  The price of poker just went up.

In addition to the 15.5K towing-capacity diesel, we also needed a crew cab...mostly so we wouldn't look like Buddy Ebsen and family driving through Beverly Hills.  Lastly, we had a few target features for this truck:

• 3500 Heavy Duty Series

• 4x4 Drivetrain

• 2007-2009 model year

• >60,000 miles

• >$30,000

• >300 miles from our Virginia location

Once you stop laughing at at that last list, you'll be surprised to know that--after hundreds of hours scouring used-truck-dot-com website--we actually found a half-dozen trucks that met that criteria.

Every truck that passed our filters on the advertisement, failed the "hands on" test..horribly.  It became clear to us that we would need to change our search parameters, or forever trek through "The Island of Misfit Trucks."

"We ride!"  - Rango

Over the span of 6-weeks, we travelled nearly 2,000 miles looking for our ideal tow vehicle.  The routine went something like this:

Dealer 1: "Here's a low mileage vehicle with no modifications.  It's hard to find something like this these days." 

Us [after a 1-minute inspection]: "So what's the story with the12" hole in the bed that is covered up with the truck box; the frame that has been almost cut in half with (what appears to be) a blow torch; and the unusual patch-like shapes under this brand new spray-on bed-liner?"

Dealer 1: "Uh...really? I had no idea."

***** 

Dealer 2: "Here's a really nice late model that looks brand spankin' new."

Us [after a 1-minute inspection]: "So what's the story with the paint on the door handles and windows that matches the truck paint; the entire underside of the truck painted completely black...to include the spare tire; the 2" space between the cab and bed on the driver's side, while it's only a 1/2" space on the passenger's side; and all the rust inside the dashboard?"

Dealer 2: "Uh...really? I had no idea."

We reverted to what we've done for years when faced with challenges and dilemmas; we reached out to our friends and confidants for comfort and advice.  It was during one of these gatherings that our friend Keith Blount spoke of the "really sweet deal" he got on his "new" Ram truck when the model year close-outs were going on-sale.  Not discounting good advice, we did a cursory search that included new vehicles. 

"...it is not the spoon that bends, only yourself."  -"Spoon Boy" from The Matrix

Within a week of entertaining the purchase of a new truck, we owned a 2014 Ram 3500.  The purchase price was understandably higher, but only a few thousand higher than the used trucks 5-8 years older.  In addition to meeting all the targets our wish list (with the exception of model year and price), it had: an 8' box, dual rear wheels, diesel exhaust brake, 4.10 AISIN transmission, in-dash info center with back-up camera, and a bunch of other stuff that would make trans-continental travel more comfortable.

Callie & Buddy checking out their new ride.




But the original reason we needed this truck was the towing and rear-axle capacity.  Here's how the new vehicle measured up:

•               Towing capacity: 29,000 lbs.

•               Rear Axle capacity: 9,750 lbs.

We were set to tow anything we wanted.  One critical pillar was in place, and now we just need something to pull...

wWw

Excogitation: Stuff

If there’s one thing the military taught us, it was how to stuff all the  stuff we’d need for a 6-month vacation into a 860 cubic-inch bag (bag, duffel, olive-drab green, NSN 8465-01-117-8699).  Of course, after the mandatory 4-sets of everything, and extra set of boots, and a half-year supply of toiletries, there wasn’t even room left for Pogey Bait.  This military concept came with the understanding that everything else—beds, tents, meals, bathrooms, water, and other necessary infrastructure items—would be provided and/or delivered.

As we prepared for our extended road-trip, we had to create a list of things we needed and wanted to take—including the infrastructure items.  This wouldn’t be an extended weekend at a B&B.  If you wanted a hot shower, you needed to pack a hot shower.

After retiring from an overseas assignment, the government will store your stuff at their cost for up to 1-year.  This was a blessing for us, as we would not need to arrange for storage or have someone “house-sit” our stuff.  This once-in-a-lifetime benefit allowed us to take immediate possession of only a portion of the stuff we thought we would need (or want) on this trip.

“You can’t have everything.  Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright

In order to decide what stuff makes the cut, you have to create a set of assumptions; otherwise you could take everything in your 60-foot tractor-trailer, or only a 860 cubic-inch bag (bag, duffel, olive-drab green, NSN 8465-01-117-8699) which pairs nicely with a 2-person tent in the back of your Prius.  So our initial assumptions/guides we went something like this:

• ·      Vehicle: 4-door, crew-cab pick-up.
• ·      RV: 28’-32’ 5^th wheel with ~2,000 lbs stuff capacity
• ·      Length of travel: 9-12 months
• ·      Expected climate: 40°F to 100°F
• ·      Bed-down locations: campgrounds, State/National parks, and public lands

With our general guidelines and assumptions in place, we proceeded to create the list of stuff we would consider taking with us on this trip.  The creation of this list can only be described as a cross between Let’s Make A Deal and selling your soul at The Crossroads.  If you want a maddening exercise in comparing apples and space stations, look around where you currently sit and began assigning prioritizing values on everything you see.  Then add any collateral items that are required for those items. 

“The things you own, end up owning you.”  -Tyler Durdan from the motion picture Fight Club

While sitting through a typhoon in Okinawa, we dreamt of peddling through the falling pastel leaves on a winding Vermont bike trail on a crisp autumn day.  We must take our bikes or we will not be able to make this dream a reality!  So our list now has two mountain bikes…plus a bike rack…plus bike repair kit…plus bike helmets/gloves/shoes…plus an air pump…plus a cable lock…and those padded shorts that you can only wear if you’re 1) on a bike, or 2) certifiably incontinent.  Now you’re looking at a whole bunch of stuff to carry around for a year just to make that Ben & Jerry’s experience a reality.

So we found ourselves looking at all of our stuff through a different set of eyes.  Some stuff was “a need”—like “the wares” (cookware & “underware”).  Some stuff was “a want”—like the bikes.  And some stuff ended-up being a compromise between the two.  We weren’t going to watch a Teton sunset drinking wine from a plastic glass, but we weren’t going to bring our good crystal either.  An inexpensive wine glass would be span this gap.

In going through this exercise, we learned quite about ourselves.  We own lots of stuff of value, but the items that were “non-negotiable must-haves” were not items that we’d ever insure or place a great deal of value upon: comfortable chairs, good cutlery, non-plastic dishes, coffee mill & French press, rice cooker, and plush bedding.  Stuff that did not make the cut included; bikes, beach gear (except swim suits), backpacks, skis, and folding tables. 

With the finalists in the Stuff Pageant inventoried, we were ready for the next (and biggest) pre-trip phase—getting something to haul our stuff.

Prolegomenon: The Vision

Chrysalis: a protective encasement in which transformation or growth occurs.

L: Roman numeral designation for the value of “50”.

Many years ago, my wife Kristy and I began envisioning of our post-military lives.  Although we both loved the military lifestyle--and more-so the honor of serving--we had strong personal desires to travel and experience the beauty of Our Country.  Unfortunately, the increased operations tempo and limitations of military sabbaticals made this goal difficult to achieve. 

"You get old when your dreams become regrets." - Brin Bellamy

Initially, the discussion of sustained travel on-the-road was more wishful rhetoric than purposeful design; creating our "bucket list" of places we wanted to see without any consideration to the logistical challenges of these grand odysseys   These discussions were typically seeded by listening to someone else's adventure; leaving us with an "expedition-envy" to an adventure that we had yet to log.  

"Learning that we're only immortal for a limited time." - Rush "Dreamline"

As the thirty-something years faded in the rearview mirror, we became more and more cognizant of that age-old quote made by white-haired oracles to their progeny: "Travel while you're young and are still able to enjoy yourselves."  We were not "old" (or at least didn't feel that old), but we also acknowledged that wilderness backpacking excursions and skiing black diamonds all day were quickly vanishing from our repertoire.  The countdown to the Après-Air Force juncture was closing in, and we embraced our dream as not only obtainable, but also as a reward to ourselves for earlier travel opportunities missed.  

"What were once vices are now habits." - 1974 album by The Doobie Brothers

As the last tour was winding down, it was evident that the military swan song was at hand.  Two things normally happen when you get to the end of a journey; you retrospectively contemplate how you got to this point, and you try to figure out which is the best direction to go from here.  Looking back was easy, as I had been blessed with a fortune of great family, friends, and memories.  Looking forward was different, as it generated an unfamiliar feeling of anxious excitement.  Excited about discovering the unknowns that lie ahead--but anxious about the unknowns that lie ahead.  

After serving in the military for over three decades, I realized that I had developed certain behaviors and expectations associated with operating in a very structured environment for a prolonged period of time.  I also realized that upon my departure from the military, the onus was on me to adapt and integrate back into society; not for society to adjust to my habits and traits.  As we continued to craft our grand travel design, I would tongue-in-cheek refer to our venture as the "Detox Tour," where we would shed the ways of the military lifestyle while assimilating ourselves into the civilian ranks.  

"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, The Master calls a butterfly."  - Richard Bach

With a combined 50-years of military service behind us, Kristy and I have begun the "Chrysalis" phase in our lives.  We will use this blog as our medium to relay our experiences, lessons-learned, observations, humor, inspirations, and anything else that we'd like to share as we continue to grow.  Act One of our lives has blessed us with many friends from many  walks of life, and we hope we will be able to break bread with those friends as we charter our course across Our Nation.  

wWw