Lazy, Swayze, & Purple Hazy

South Texas was not on our original travel itinerary, but it was easier to manipulate our travel plan than the weather.   Being months into our Odyssey, we had not seen our primary care provider for well-over 6-months.  It had also been a few months since Kristy’s fractured vertebrae detailed in Episode 13.  Hank was coming up on a visit to the shop for some routine maintenance; and we probably needed to follow suit. 

After spending a dozen years in San Antonio and the Texas Hill Country area, we were familiar with the type of surroundings we could expect.  Since hiking was not one of the tourist draws to San Antonio, we focused on a more rural area with an RV park.  This led us to Boerne, Texas.  Boerne is located 40-minutes from The Alamo, so that put gave us the rural setting we desired, with the convenience of big city amenities and a large military medical care network.  

“Lies, Damn Lies, & Statistics.” - Mark Twain

Statistically speaking, we were going to experience our “least favorite” destination at some point in this trip.  Normally this unpopular promulgation would occur at some future time whist retrospectively pontificating over a favored libation.  Unfortunately, we knew early-on that this was not going to be a positively-memorable location. 

Glen Quagmire endorsed quagmire

The park was not the most well-kept park we’d seen.  Tree limbs were low enough to knock the wax off most RVs.  The pads were a combination of gravel and muddy depressions—with some being just mud with muddy depressions.  The manager was extremely effective at swiping a credit card, but was reluctant to entertain the idea of having UPS dropping off a package for us. We quickly got the impression that the staff was not really interested in the business attributes (friendly, customer oriented, maintenance upkeep, etc) that we had experienced in private campgrounds up to this point.  Kinda Lazy.

There are two notable features of this campground, with the most recent being that it served as a filming location for the 1-hour and 34-minute Patrick Swayze movie Father Hood.  One of the prehistoric props still stands guard over the muddy, rutted parking lot.

Another on-site attraction is the 230’ subterranean cavern where you can “swim in the Edwards Aquifer.”  After residing in San Antonio for 12+ years, and knowing that all of the drinking water provided to the residents of The Alamo City originates from the Edwards Aquifer…I decided to be nice and not alter the water’s palatability.

"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it." — W. C. Fields

During our short stay, we met a few fellow RVers who were traveling to and from various locations, but we were the minority.  The majority of the sites were filled with long-term residents, who had a creative menagerie of accompanying structures in/around/affixed to their trailers.  There was one particular trailer parked adjacent to us that was in serious need of repairs, as there was significant separation at the seams which exposed the insulation and inner infrastructure.  The sole resident was a dog, who spent his days guarding the trailer and listening to Jimi Hendrix.  Occasionally a beat-up pick-up truck would visit, as would a Mercedes-Benz SUV.  They would bring some supplies, visit with the dog for a few hours, then leave.  I think the dog’s name was Jesse Pinkman, as he looked like the type that could “break bad” at any moment.

We began our journey into the retiree medical system and were given an initial appointment about 7-10 days out.  That initial appointment came with the indication that there would be more follow-up appointments—all spaced out a couple of weeks each.  As we looked at our appointments on the calendar—and then at the potential for how long we may be required to remain in the Hill Country area—we made a decision that even Nostradamus could not have foreseen.  With several days still paid for at the private park, we pulled chalks and headed back to our humble Air Force beginnings— Lackland Air Force Base.

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